Regrets? Not for me! DREAM-EXPLORE-DISCOVER all the way In!!!

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Anglers Rest “the Book of Me”

 

Anglers Rest  In Deep with the Book of Me

Prompt 2 – February 2015 – Explore. Dream. Discover.

”Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do, than by the ones you did…….. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

 

Julie Goucher prompts are always thought provoking. This one more so that the others in my mind.

I have made tough choices over the year. Some I was sure was the correct route to take in life. Yet when I look back on those choices, I find all the positive, learning, growth aspects it provided me. How can you regret something that helps you become you?

  1. Career choices: Nursing or English teacher?
  2. College: Take time off before going or start right away in the fall?
  3. Marriage: Straight from High School or make your way in life on your own?
  4. Children: To have or Not?

I am confident the decisions I made were what I needed in my life at the time.

June 1978

June Lee Stearns-Butka

 

  1. Career: I chose Nursing. My mother was happy at that choice. She regretted not being able to go to nursing school and carry on her grandmother’s profession. I look back now, part of my decision to enter the field was to please my mother. Giving my mother that sense of accomplishment through me is a decision I will never regret. I am a caregiver by nature, no matter what I do in life. I am physically unable to work in my beloved profession; it doesn’t prevent me from still providing care in different ways. Supportive eyes and ears are sometimes all that is needed.
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Nelson & Shirley Stearns 35th Anniversary 

 

2. College/Nursing School: I took time off to work as a caregiver, CAN (certified nursing assistant,) mental health worker and other odds jobs before deciding to start a three year diploma nursing program. Near the end of my first year my parent both became ill. Dad had his first heart attack, Mom her first round of cancer. I quit school to care for my parent and younger, still at home siblings. The youngest was only five years old. I do not regret that decision, even though the school Nursing Director, would not accept me back because she thought it was immature of me to leave a paid program to care for my family. NO REGRETS, I was there when my family needed me the most. Family comes first in my book every time. I did go on to obtain my nursing license and worked until my body failed me. Disabilities can slow you down but they cannot stop you from learning new things, new ways, and how to adapt to life challenges. I can provide care with my thoughts, loving support and just being there even if I can’t walk any distance or lift anything more than 30 pounds.

 

 

Mike & June's Wedding Day

Mike & June’s Butka’s Wedding Day 

 

3. Marriage didn’t happened to me until I was 25 years old. I learned to stand on my own two feet, make decisions on my own, take care of a household with the support of a man and many other abilities too numerous to mention. I was the oldest child, I needed to have that alone time, before I could be a partner to someone with the support needed in a lifelong commitment. Did I kiss a few frogs? Yes. Do I regret what I learned from them? No. Those relationships give me the strength and knowledge of what I was looking for when the time came. I found a partner who accepted me as a person first, not doormat, do as I say, stay barefoot and pregnant. We built and are still building a strong loving relationship that provides support to each other. Yes, sometimes more so on one side than the other. That rotates back and forth depending on the circumstances we encounter. A roller coaster ride of ups and downs. Enjoy the happy times-support the sad times that is what makes us stronger.

The Butka Family

The Butka Family

 

4. Children: I don’t think there was ever a time that I didn’t truly want children at some point in my life. I wasn’t ready to have them when I first graduated high school and was considering a serious relationship that included marriage. You see I am one of those woman who grew up straddling the fence of “Father knows Best” and “Burn your Bras.” I needed time to find out who I was first before taking on the job of raising children. I had been a second Mom to my siblings, I didn’t want to be a young mother. When I met my husband to be, I was in nursing school, her was in the drafting program at the same college. We met in September, started dating in January and were married in April. No regrets. He moved after graduation to New Jersey to start working for Bells Labs. I followed after graduating my nursing program two months later. I did not accept the next level of college I had applied for. I would apply in New Jersey schools and continue my education. Best laid plans…. Our first child surprised us. I never looked back. I have two intelligent, productive, independent adult children who provide joy in my life every day. DEFINITELY NO REGRETS.

DREAM-EXPLORE-DISCOVER: I do that daily. I cannot regret what something that hasn’t happened yet, because life isn’t over. It may not be what I planned to do, but I can assure you that it was meant to be.

 

To not dream, to not explore, to not discover what life or path there is, would be the regret.

NO Regrets that is for sure. Welcome world. What do you offer me today? I’m ready to learn.

The Stearns Family

The Stearns Family

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Filed under Genealogy, The Book of Me

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